CHRIST`mas (fucking) shopping was the main goal for Mrs Hanbury today (my mam). We started the day at 9am and I had the hottest shower just to compensate for the icy temperature of the house. My flat in London is always hot, sometimes a little too hot. How the hell could a house be this cold. I had never noticed it before, like my Welsh, strong, thermal blood was evolving into that of a... do I dare say it?.... a lifeless turkeys skin. Visually too! Its all wrong. So yeah, I basically burnt my skin with the shower heat. Mid-GLAM!
I yelled down the stairs for Mrs H to put the kettle on. Everyone yells in Wales. I FORGOT THIS TOO!!!(see?! yelling!)
Never the one to be prepared for such weathers as 5 inches of snow before I packed and left London yesterday morning. I dressed into something that was part "Maggie" (from the Simpsons), part Audrey Hepburn. Thick tights, patent black pumps, a stripy jersey dress and a double breasted, sued brown coat....and sunglasses! IT WAS SUNNY! (<-- yelling!) My beautiful Nanna, Mrs H and I`s first stop was The Princess of Wales Hospital, Bridgend. Beautiful Nanna was having a check up and so Mrs H and I waited in....a corridor. Mrs H had read in "Take -A-Break" that women all over the country had been given money for sending in photos of things that look like a face. You know how a upside down plug can look like a face etc.... Well! We found the best face ever! (picture above!) We told Beautiful Nanna of our new game when she came back and she said we should have taken another photo with the tap on.....so it looked like the face had a "running" nose! NICE!!! Our next stop was Currys, Commet, M&S, Next and a pee. Mrs H had pointed out a fallen over inflatable Santa on a round about. Mrs H couldn't just laugh and turn off the round about. She kept going around and informed my grandmother and I that it looked like Santa was fucking someone. Mrs H has an eye for these things. Its a talent. A good 7 hours later ,snow drifted by. We were all cold and getting a little moody with each other. Shopping wasn't fun anymore. We wernt looking for "nice things" to get people. We were now picking up things just because it CHRISTMAS! Why does it have to be about presents?? Cant we all just go paint balling instead? Suggestions of what we "SHOULD" do on Christmas day are more than welcome. You have been lovely and I dare say, Im sure I will blog something far more entertaining in the next couple of days before the big dead Turkey is presented as a table decoration. Keep well. Wrap up warm. Drink your parents booze on the sly! x
I yelled down the stairs for Mrs H to put the kettle on. Everyone yells in Wales. I FORGOT THIS TOO!!!(see?! yelling!)
Never the one to be prepared for such weathers as 5 inches of snow before I packed and left London yesterday morning. I dressed into something that was part "Maggie" (from the Simpsons), part Audrey Hepburn. Thick tights, patent black pumps, a stripy jersey dress and a double breasted, sued brown coat....and sunglasses! IT WAS SUNNY! (<-- yelling!) My beautiful Nanna, Mrs H and I`s first stop was The Princess of Wales Hospital, Bridgend. Beautiful Nanna was having a check up and so Mrs H and I waited in....a corridor. Mrs H had read in "Take -A-Break" that women all over the country had been given money for sending in photos of things that look like a face. You know how a upside down plug can look like a face etc.... Well! We found the best face ever! (picture above!) We told Beautiful Nanna of our new game when she came back and she said we should have taken another photo with the tap on.....so it looked like the face had a "running" nose! NICE!!! Our next stop was Currys, Commet, M&S, Next and a pee. Mrs H had pointed out a fallen over inflatable Santa on a round about. Mrs H couldn't just laugh and turn off the round about. She kept going around and informed my grandmother and I that it looked like Santa was fucking someone. Mrs H has an eye for these things. Its a talent. A good 7 hours later ,snow drifted by. We were all cold and getting a little moody with each other. Shopping wasn't fun anymore. We wernt looking for "nice things" to get people. We were now picking up things just because it CHRISTMAS! Why does it have to be about presents?? Cant we all just go paint balling instead? Suggestions of what we "SHOULD" do on Christmas day are more than welcome. You have been lovely and I dare say, Im sure I will blog something far more entertaining in the next couple of days before the big dead Turkey is presented as a table decoration. Keep well. Wrap up warm. Drink your parents booze on the sly! x
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